{"id":3472,"date":"2020-10-17T18:35:19","date_gmt":"2020-10-17T15:35:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mordayanisma.org\/?p=3472"},"modified":"2025-06-17T13:18:52","modified_gmt":"2025-06-17T10:18:52","slug":"anne-ben-feminist-oldum-4","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/2020\/10\/17\/anne-ben-feminist-oldum-4\/","title":{"rendered":"Anne Ben Feminist Oldum-4"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\"><p><strong>Ay\u015feg\u00fcl G\u00f6\u00e7men\u2019in gen\u00e7 bir kad\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fck m\u00fccadelesine kat\u0131lma, feminist olma \u00f6yk\u00fclerini anlatan \u201cAnne Ben Feminist Oldum\u201d yaz\u0131 dizisini sizlerle payla\u015f\u0131yoruz.<\/strong><\/p><p><\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A\u015fk b\u00f6yle bir \u015fey mi? Hem tehlike dolu hem \u00e7ok heyecanl\u0131\u2026 Hem her an kendini yenileyen hem de d\u00fcnyay\u0131 daha \u00e7ok sevdiren\u2026 A\u015fk nas\u0131l biri? Orman g\u00f6zl\u00fc bir erkek mi? Yoksa esmer tenli bir kad\u0131n? \u0130ki ayn\u0131 bedenin birbirine de\u011fmesi mi? G\u00f6zlerden uzak sar\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131n sokaklar ve g\u00f6zler \u00f6n\u00fcnde \u00f6p\u00fc\u015fmek i\u00e7in verdi\u011fin sava\u015f m\u0131d\u0131r a\u015fk? \u2018\u2019Anne ben feminist oldum\u2019\u2019&nbsp; olmas\u0131na ama san\u0131r\u0131m \u00e2\u015f\u0131k da oluyorum\u2026&nbsp; Sorsam babama o da anneme \u00e2\u015f\u0131k. Ama bir g\u00fcn bile anneme seni seviyorum dedi\u011fini duymad\u0131m\u2026 Kap\u0131 kom\u015fumuz Zeynep ablan\u0131n kocas\u0131 da ona \u00e2\u015f\u0131km\u0131\u015f. Ama adam\u0131n Zeynep ablay\u0131 dinledi\u011fi, bir kere de s\u00f6z\u00fcne k\u0131ymet verdi\u011fi yok\u2026 Haftan\u0131n en az \u00fc\u00e7 ak\u015fam\u0131 mahalleyi azarlamalar\u0131 ile inleten Halil amca da Serap teyzeye \u00e7ok \u00e2\u015f\u0131km\u0131\u015f\u2026 Peh! A\u015fklara bak yahu!&nbsp; Birileri gelse de bu mahallenin erkeklerine a\u015fk\u0131 anlatsa\u2026 Bu ba\u015fka bir yaz\u0131n\u0131n konusu ama ge\u00e7enlerde Aysel teyzelere gitti\u011fimde vitrinin i\u00e7inde duran bir kitap ili\u015fti g\u00f6z\u00fcme. Tabi vitrinin kapa\u011f\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7mamla kitab\u0131 Aysel teyzeden istemem bir oldu. Bir gecede i\u00e7tim kitab\u0131 su i\u00e7er gibi&#8230; Bir yerinde yazar;&nbsp; Sevgiyi \u2018\u2019ki\u015finin kendinin ve bir ba\u015fkas\u0131n\u0131n tinsel geli\u015fimini beslemek amac\u0131yla benli\u011fini geni\u015fletme iradesi\u2019\u2019 olarak kavramay\u0131 ilk kez \u00f6\u011frendi\u011fimde yirmilerimin ortas\u0131ndayd\u0131m\u2019\u2019 diyor. Ben de yirmilerimin ortas\u0131nda say\u0131l\u0131r\u0131m ama biz kad\u0131nlar i\u00e7in sevgiyi, toplumsal cinsiyet rollerimiz gere\u011fi bizden beklenen \u015feylerle kar\u0131\u015ft\u0131rmamak \u00f6yle zor bir i\u015f ki bunu ger\u00e7ekten \u00f6\u011frenebilmek i\u00e7in bir yirmi y\u0131l daha beklemek istemiyorum\u2026 Sevmek \u00e7ok kolay asl\u0131nda zor olan senden bekledikleri rollerden s\u0131yr\u0131l\u0131p her iki taraf\u0131nda \u00f6znesi olabildi\u011fi yeni ve farkl\u0131 bir sevgi anlay\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 m\u00fcmk\u00fcn k\u0131labilmek\u2026&nbsp; Peki, sevgi ve a\u015fktan b\u00f6yle bahsederken bahsi ge\u00e7en bu d\u00fcnyay\u0131 nas\u0131l yaratabiliriz? Bu d\u00fcnyada k\u0131rk y\u0131l\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131nda kald\u0131rd\u0131klar\u0131 sofran\u0131n laf\u0131n\u0131 bir as\u0131r eden erkeklere yer olmas\u0131n mesela. Bu d\u00fcnyada beni k\u0131skanan ve bunu da marifet san\u0131p asl\u0131nda hayat\u0131m\u0131 zindan eden erkekler de olmas\u0131n. Beni \u00e7ama\u015f\u0131r ya da bula\u015f\u0131k makinesi san\u0131p \u00d6zg\u00fcr ismini sadece do\u011fan erkek bebeklere veren babalar da olmas\u0131n! Zaten evimin i\u00e7indeki ve d\u0131\u015f\u0131ndaki d\u00fcnya beni her taraf\u0131mdan \u00e7eki\u015ftirip zorlamaya devam ediyor.&nbsp; \u0130lk eylemimim de yedi\u011fim cop darbesi ile moraran kolum daha yeni yeni iyile\u015fiyor\u2026&nbsp; \u0130\u015f yerinde maruz b\u0131rak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131m cinsiyet\u00e7i ama komik(!) \u015fakalar ve pandemi y\u00fcz\u00fcnden s\u00fcrekli daha \u00e7ok ama daha az g\u00fcvenceli \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak zorunda kald\u0131\u011f\u0131m i\u015f ortam\u0131m&#8230; S\u00fcrekli ayn\u0131 fabrika \u00e7\u0131k\u0131\u015fl\u0131 ezberci e\u011fitim s\u0131navlar\u0131 ve s\u0131nav sonu\u00e7 belgesindeki hep ayn\u0131 sonu\u00e7: \u0130\u015fsizlik&#8230;&nbsp; \u00dczerine bir de yetmezmi\u015f gibi do\u011fay\u0131 her ge\u00e7en saniye yok olu\u015fa yani asl\u0131nda kendi yok olu\u015fumuza g\u00f6t\u00fcren rant anlay\u0131\u015f\u0131&#8230; \u0130nsan t\u00fcm bunlar i\u00e7inde nas\u0131l sever, \u00e2\u015f\u0131k olur? Her g\u00fcn en az 3 kad\u0131n\u0131n neredeyse her defas\u0131nda tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir erkek taraf\u0131ndan \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fc\u011f\u00fc ve ad\u0131na&nbsp; \u2018a\u015fk cinayeti\u2019\u2019 , \u2018k\u0131skan\u00e7l\u0131k cinayeti\u2019 , \u2018namus cinayeti\u2019 dedikleri bir toplumun i\u00e7erisinde feminist ama \u00fctopik olmayan bir a\u015fk\u0131n resmini hangi f\u0131r\u00e7a ile \u00e7izebiliriz? Peki, bunun i\u00e7in a\u015fktan vaz m\u0131 ge\u00e7mek zorunday\u0131z? Yoksa m\u00fccadele alanlar\u0131ndan birini yani a\u015fk\u0131 ve sevgiyi yeniden tart\u0131\u015fmaya a\u00e7\u0131p, onu politikle\u015ftirip nihayetinde istedi\u011fimiz gibi bir a\u015fk ve sevgi tan\u0131m\u0131 ile mi devam etmeliyiz yola? \u00dczerine d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f ve toplumsal cinsiyet rollerinden kurtulmu\u015f bir a\u015fk tan\u0131m\u0131\u2026 Aysel teyze olsa \u2018\u2019toplumsal cinsiyet rolleri ne ola ki k\u0131z\u2019\u2019 derdi.&nbsp; Ben de ona \u2018\u2019 annemin hep bula\u015f\u0131k y\u0131karken babam\u0131n bunu hi\u00e7 yapmamas\u0131n\u0131n nedeni\u2019\u2019 derdim. Asl\u0131nda bu Aysel teyze \u00e7ok tuhaf biri&#8230; Bazen ben ona bilmi\u015f bilmi\u015f bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 sanarken g\u00f6zleriyle \u00f6yle bir bak\u0131yor ki bana sanki ben bunlar\u0131 yalad\u0131m da yuttum der gibi. Her neyse a\u015fk b\u00f6yle bir \u015fey i\u015fte Aysel Teyzeci\u011fim&#8230; Ba\u015fka bir d\u00fcnyay\u0131 m\u00fcmk\u00fcn k\u0131lan ve hep geli\u015ftiren, d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcren ba\u015fka bir \u015fey&#8230; Bizim evdekine hi\u00e7 benzemeyen bir \u015fey&#8230; Ev demi\u015fken \u00f6fkeyle a\u00e7\u0131lan kap\u0131n\u0131n sesini duyuyorum ve t\u00fcm bunlardan uzakla\u015fmam bir saniyemi bile alm\u0131yor&#8230; \u00d6fkeyle oldu\u011funa eminim \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc annemden \u00f6\u011frendim kap\u0131lar\u0131n dilini&#8230; E\u011fer annem gibi bir kad\u0131nsan\u0131z kap\u0131n\u0131n nas\u0131l a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan bile anlayabilirsiniz o gecenin o evde nas\u0131l ge\u00e7ece\u011fini\u2026 Her neyse\u2026 &nbsp;\u015eimdi \u00e2\u015f\u0131k olurken ne \u00e7arpan kap\u0131lardan ne ete\u011fimin boyundan, ne de ba\u015fka \u015feylerden bahsetmek istemiyorum. &nbsp;\u015eimdi istedi\u011fim tek \u015fey benim istedi\u011fim gibi bir sevgiyi nas\u0131l var edece\u011fim\u2026 Aysel teyzeden ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m kitaba g\u00f6re feminizm t\u00fcm bunlardan bahsediyor. G\u00f6r\u00fcyorsunuz de\u011fil mi? Feminizmin her \u015feye bir cevab\u0131 var. San\u0131r\u0131m her \u015feye cevap bulabilen bir kad\u0131n\u0131 neden sevmiyorlarsa feminizmi de bu y\u00fczden sevmiyor bu ataerkil d\u00fcnya\u2026&nbsp; Ben \u00f6yle \u00e7ok benimsemek istiyorum ki t\u00fcm bunlar\u0131&#8230; E\u015fit bir a\u015fk\u0131, bo\u011fmayan ve hep geli\u015ftiren ba\u015fka bir sevgiyi, her ko\u015ful alt\u0131nda iyi hissettiren taptaze yo\u011funluklar\u0131\u2026 Kad\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 ortaya koyan, besleyen ve ne\u015fe katan halleri\u2026 Yani uzun laf\u0131n k\u0131sas\u0131 bazen elime bir boya al\u0131p \u015fehrin t\u00fcm duvarlar\u0131n\u0131 bununla donatmak istiyorum:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>\u2018\u2019Anne Ben Feminist Oldum\u2019\u2019<\/strong><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ay\u015feg\u00fcl G\u00f6\u00e7men\u2019in gen\u00e7 bir kad\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fck m\u00fccadelesine kat\u0131lma, feminist olma \u00f6yk\u00fclerini anlatan \u201cAnne Ben Feminist Oldum\u201d yaz\u0131 dizisini sizlerle payla\u015f\u0131yoruz. A\u015fk b\u00f6yle bir \u015fey mi? Hem tehlike dolu hem \u00e7ok heyecanl\u0131\u2026 Hem her an kendini yenileyen hem de d\u00fcnyay\u0131 daha \u00e7ok sevdiren\u2026 A\u015fk nas\u0131l biri? Orman g\u00f6zl\u00fc bir erkek mi? Yoksa esmer tenli bir kad\u0131n?&hellip;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":3473,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_eb_attr":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[98],"tags":[264,295],"ppma_author":[591],"class_list":["post-3472","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-kultur-sanat","tag-annebenfeministoldum","tag-ask","author-aysegul"],"authors":[{"term_id":591,"user_id":0,"is_guest":1,"slug":"aysegul","display_name":"Ay\u015feg\u00fcl Tem\u00fcr","avatar_url":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/wp-content\/litespeed\/avatar\/4e85db3e916097bd685fe0d0033e9fb9.jpg?ver=1784243256","author_category":"1","first_name":"Ay\u015feg\u00fcl","last_name":"Tem\u00fcr","user_url":"","job_title":"","description":"aysegultemur@mordayanisma.org"}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3472","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3472"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3472\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3473"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3472"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3472"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3472"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/ppma_author?post=3472"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}