{"id":2418,"date":"2020-04-29T18:48:03","date_gmt":"2020-04-29T15:48:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mordayanisma.org\/?p=2418"},"modified":"2025-01-26T18:11:58","modified_gmt":"2025-01-26T15:11:58","slug":"gundem-siddet-sorun-cezasizlik-cozum-kosulsuz-kadin-dayanismasi-cigdem-altunok","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/2020\/04\/29\/gundem-siddet-sorun-cezasizlik-cozum-kosulsuz-kadin-dayanismasi-cigdem-altunok\/","title":{"rendered":"G\u00fcndem \u015eiddet Sorun Cezas\u0131zl\u0131k \u00c7\u00f6z\u00fcm Ko\u015fulsuz Kad\u0131n Dayan\u0131\u015fmas\u0131 \u2013 \u00c7i\u011fdem Altunok"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\n

\u015eiddet i\u00e7eren toksik ili\u015fkilerden kurtulup ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131zla\u015fman\u0131n yollar\u0131ndan en \u00f6nemlisi kad\u0131n\u0131n g\u00fc\u00e7lenmesidir. Bu da erke\u011fin a\u015fama a\u015fama y\u0131kt\u0131\u011f\u0131 kendine g\u00fcveni yeniden in\u015fa\u00a0etme\u00a0ve \u015fiddetin gerek\u00e7esinin olamayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ve bu ili\u015fkiye mecbur olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 anlamas\u0131ndan ge\u00e7er. \u0130li\u015fkileri s\u00fcresince etraf\u0131ndan kopar\u0131l\u0131p,\u00a0yaln\u0131z b\u0131rak\u0131lan kad\u0131nlar\u0131n yeniden g\u00fc\u00e7lenmelerinin yolu kad\u0131n dayan\u0131\u015fmas\u0131ndan, k\u0131z karde\u015flikten ge\u00e7er.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n


Eric Fromm, \u201c\u00d6zg\u00fcrl\u00fckten Ka\u00e7\u0131\u015f\u201d[1]<\/a> kitab\u0131na insan\u0131n neden kendi \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc diktat\u00f6rlerin eline b\u0131rakmaya ve bir robot gibi ya\u015famaya raz\u0131 oldu\u011fu sorgulamas\u0131 ile ba\u015flar. Kad\u0131nlar \u00f6zelinde de kad\u0131n\u0131n ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131zla\u015fmay\u0131 i\u00e7selle\u015ftirememesi ile ba\u015flayan teorik tart\u0131\u015fmalar, \u201c\u015fiddet g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc erkekten kopamamaya\u201d de\u011fin sorgulamalara var\u0131r. Bu sorgulamalar s\u0131ras\u0131nda g\u00f6z ard\u0131 edilen noktalardan biri; toplumsal cinsiyet rollerinin yerle\u015fikli\u011finden \u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fc, do\u011fumundan itibaren korunmaya, sevilmeye ve bir kurtar\u0131c\u0131ya muhta\u00e7 oldu\u011fu \u00f6\u011fretilen kad\u0131nlar\u0131n g\u00fcn gelip de art\u0131k \u201ckurtar\u0131lmay\u0131 beklemeden\u201d hayatlar\u0131 ile ne yapacaklar\u0131na kendilerinin karar verebilecekleri s\u00f6ylendi\u011finde, ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131 \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fck korkusudur. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Colette Dowling Sindirella Kompleksi\u2019nde[2]<\/a> \u201c\u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn \u00fcrk\u00fct\u00fcc\u00fc olmas\u0131n\u0131n tela\u015fla geri ka\u00e7mam\u0131za, g\u00fcvenli, tan\u0131d\u0131k, bildik bir yere s\u0131\u011f\u0131nmam\u0131za neden oldu\u011funu\u201d belirtir. Uzakla\u015fma f\u0131rsat\u0131m\u0131z varken ortaya \u00e7\u0131kan geri \u00e7ekilme e\u011filimine sebep olarak korkuyu g\u00f6\u011f\u00fcsleyip a\u015fmaya al\u0131\u015f\u0131k olmamam\u0131z\u0131 g\u00f6sterir. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc Dowling\u2019e g\u00f6re \u201ckad\u0131nlar, \u00e7ocukluktan itibaren sa\u011fl\u0131ks\u0131z \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fcde ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 olmaya \u00f6zendirilmektedir. Erkeklere bu \u00f6z-yeterlili\u011fi bah\u015feden do\u011fa de\u011fildir; e\u011fitimdir. Erkekler, do\u011fduklar\u0131 g\u00fcnden itibaren ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131zl\u0131k i\u00e7in e\u011fitilir. Tam tersine k\u0131zlara ise bir \u00e7\u0131k\u0131\u015f yollar\u0131 oldu\u011fu, bir g\u00fcn, bir \u015fekilde kurtar\u0131lacaklar\u0131 \u00f6\u011fretilir.\u201d \u00d6te yandan g\u00fcn gelir ve kad\u0131nlar\u0131n kendilerini bu s\u00f6zde kurtar\u0131c\u0131lar ve i\u00e7inde bulunduklar\u0131 \u015fiddet sarmal\u0131ndan kurtarmalar\u0131 gerekir ve beklenir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u015eiddete U\u011frayan\u0131 De\u011fil Uygulayan\u0131 Yarg\u0131la<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Bu beklentinin dozu kimi zaman \u015fiddetin ve \u015fiddet uygulayan\u0131n ele\u015ftirilmesinden \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p buna maruz kalan\u0131n yarg\u0131lanmas\u0131na do\u011fru artar. Fiziksel, cinsel, ekonomik ya da psikolojik formlarda \u015fiddet i\u00e7eren ili\u015fkilerde kad\u0131n ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131zl\u0131k korkusu temelinde ekonomik, fiziksel, toplumsal ve psikolojik gerek\u00e7elerle ili\u015fkiye devam eder. Ekonomik ko\u015fullar\u0131n\u0131n yetersizli\u011fi ve g\u00fcvencesizlik, sosyal g\u00fcvenlik politikalar\u0131n\u0131n yoklu\u011fu ve kad\u0131nlar\u0131 kapsamamas\u0131, bir i\u015f ve gidecek yerin olmamas\u0131 sebepleri ile \u015fiddete u\u011frad\u0131\u011f\u0131 evde kalan (kalmak zorunda b\u0131rak\u0131lan) kad\u0131nlar\u0131n varl\u0131\u011f\u0131, hepimizin malumu. \u00d6te yandan \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131n olmas\u0131 da kad\u0131nlar i\u00e7in kuvvetli bir gerek\u00e7e olmakta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Toplum g\u00f6z\u00fcnde \u201cyuva yapan di\u015fi ku\u015f\u201d rol\u00fcnden bir anda \u00e7ocuklar\u0131na ra\u011fmen yuvas\u0131n\u0131 y\u0131kan \u201cne bi\u00e7im anne\u201dye d\u00f6nme ihtimali kad\u0131nlar\u0131n korkulu r\u00fcyas\u0131 oluverir. Kad\u0131nlar\u0131n evi terk etme sonras\u0131 tekrar \u201cbaba evine\u201d d\u00f6necek olmalar\u0131, aile ve toplumdan g\u00f6recekleri bask\u0131 da onlar\u0131 cayd\u0131ran sebepler aras\u0131ndad\u0131r. Hepimizin i\u00e7indeki \u201ckamu vicdan\u0131\u201d \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmayan, \u00e7ocuklu bir kad\u0131n\u0131n \u015fiddet g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc evlili\u011fini bitirememesini yine bir derece anlar; ama i\u015f, g\u00fczel, \u00fcnl\u00fc, gen\u00e7, e\u011fitimli ya da ekonomik \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011f\u00fc olan bir kad\u0131n\u0131n sevgilisini devam eden \u015fiddete ra\u011fmen terk etmemesine geldi mi i\u00e7imizden ona parmak sallayan biri \u00e7\u0131k\u0131verir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c7ok sevdi\u011fimiz annemiz, k\u0131z karde\u015fimiz, yak\u0131n arkada\u015f\u0131m\u0131z, i\u015f arkada\u015f\u0131m\u0131z ya da yan kom\u015fumuzun nas\u0131l olup da kendisine bu denli zarar veren bir ili\u015fkiyi s\u00fcrd\u00fcrd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc anlayamay\u0131z. Bol \u201cNeden, Nas\u0131l?\u201dl\u0131 sorularla sorgular\u0131z, yarg\u0131lar\u0131z, k\u0131zar\u0131z. En \u00e7ok da bu ili\u015fkiyi bitirmesi i\u00e7in destek oldu\u011fumuz ama bir s\u00fcre sonra yine o ili\u015fkiye d\u00f6nen kad\u0131nlar\u0131 anlamakta zorlan\u0131r\u0131z. Onu \u201ckurtarmak\u201d i\u00e7in harcad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z zaman ve emek i\u00e7in hay\u0131flan\u0131r\u0131z. Bu yarg\u0131lama baz\u0131 dillerde \u201cbundan b\u00f6yle ba\u015f\u0131na ne gelse m\u00fcstehakt\u0131r\u201d\u0131 zikretmeye kadar var\u0131r. Uzatt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z eli tutmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 i\u00e7in, ba\u015fka ellerin \u015fiddetine u\u011framas\u0131 anla\u015f\u0131l\u0131r olmu\u015ftur art\u0131k.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Halbuki \u015fiddetin en a\u011f\u0131r bi\u00e7imlerinden birisi hem en g\u00f6r\u00fcnmeyen olmas\u0131yla hem de di\u011fer t\u00fcm \u015fiddet t\u00fcrlerinde de arka planda uygulanmas\u0131 sebebiyle psikolojik \u015fiddettir. Fark edilme ve ispatlanmas\u0131n\u0131n g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc\u011f\u00fc, \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fclememesi ve normalle\u015ftirilmesi nedeniyle \u00e7o\u011fu zaman g\u00f6z ard\u0131 edilir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Psikolojik \u015fiddet a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131kl\u0131 ili\u015fkilerde, kad\u0131nlar \u00e7o\u011funlukla \u201c\u00e7ok a\u015f\u0131k olunduklar\u0131 ve olduklar\u0131 ve tutku dolu sevildikleri\u201d efsanesini duyar \u00f6te yandan bu \u015fiddetin sebebinin kendisi oldu\u011funa inand\u0131r\u0131l\u0131rlar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bir tiyatro oyunundan gelen ve psikolojik i\u015fkence y\u00f6ntemi olarak bilinen Gaslighting\u00b9<\/a>de kar\u0131s\u0131na \u00e7e\u015fitli oyunlar oynayarak zamanla kendisinden \u015f\u00fcphe etmesine yol a\u00e7an bir erke\u011fin yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi, narsistik erkekler de s\u00fcrd\u00fcrd\u00fckleri manip\u00fclatif yollarla kar\u015f\u0131 taraf\u0131 kendisinden \u015f\u00fcphe eder duruma d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr\u00fcp, s\u00fcrekli kontrol ederek \u015fiddeti g\u00fcnden g\u00fcne derinle\u015ftirir ve ki\u015fiyi kendisine ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 k\u0131lar. Bu t\u00fcr bir ili\u015fki i\u00e7erisinde kad\u0131na, kendini kimi zaman \u201ckrali\u00e7e\u201d gibi hissettirirken \u00f6te yandan insanl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 unutturan da yine bu adamlard\u0131r. \u201cSeni benim kadar kimse sevemez\u201dlerle kad\u0131n\u0131, \u201csensiz ben bir hi\u00e7im\u201dle kendisini kad\u0131na ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 k\u0131lar. B\u00f6ylece kad\u0131n bu ili\u015fkinin biti\u015finin hem kendi hem de \u201csevdi\u011fi\u201d erke\u011fin sonu olaca\u011f\u0131na kuvvetli \u015fekilde inan\u0131r. Bu \u015fekilde; kad\u0131nlar ili\u015fkinin de\u011fil, ili\u015fkideki \u015fiddetin bitmesini istediklerinden bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc ili\u015fkiyi sonland\u0131ramaz ve kendilerini s\u00fcrekli tekrar eden bir d\u00f6ng\u00fcde bulurlar. Bu d\u00f6ng\u00fcy\u00fc besleyen bir ba\u015fka nokta da; \u015fiddet uygulayan ki\u015finin \u201c\u00f6fke hali sonras\u0131 pi\u015fman olmu\u015f, af dileyen, sevgi(!) dolu halleridir\u201d. Kad\u0131nlar s\u0131kl\u0131kla bu pi\u015fmanl\u0131\u011f\u0131n b\u00fcy\u00fcs\u00fcne kap\u0131l\u0131p, bunun tekrarlanmayaca\u011f\u0131na ya da zamanla de\u011fi\u015fece\u011fine g\u00fcvenmek ister ve devam ederler. Oysaki bo\u015fanmalar\u0131n genel ge\u00e7er sebeplerinden biri \u015fiddetli ge\u00e7imsizliktir. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc \u015fiddetin oldu\u011fu ili\u015fkide sevgi olamaz. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc \u015fiddet olan ili\u015fki \u015fiddetsiz var olamaz.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1960\u2019larda yap\u0131lan bir deney sonras\u0131 ortaya at\u0131lan \u201c\u00f6\u011frenilmi\u015f \u00e7aresizlik\u201d kavram\u0131 da harekete ge\u00e7ememenin anla\u015f\u0131lmas\u0131na yard\u0131mc\u0131 olur. \u00d6\u011frenilmi\u015f \u00e7aresizli\u011fe g\u00f6re canl\u0131lar, ge\u00e7mi\u015fteki tecr\u00fcbelerinden dolay\u0131 de\u011fi\u015fimi ger\u00e7ekle\u015ftirmenin zor ve neredeyse imkans\u0131z oldu\u011funu ve yine davran\u0131\u015flar\u0131n\u0131n bir olay ya da durumun sonucu \u00fczerinde hi\u00e7bir etkisi olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnerek de\u011fi\u015fime kar\u015f\u0131 pasif bir diren\u00e7 g\u00f6sterebilmektedirler.[3]<\/a> \u00d6\u011frenilmi\u015f \u00e7aresizlik, kontrol d\u0131\u015f\u0131, rahats\u0131zl\u0131k uyand\u0131ran olaylara s\u00fcrekli maruz kalman\u0131n sonucu olarak \u00f6\u011frenme yetene\u011finde azalma g\u00f6r\u00fclmesi \u015feklinde de a\u00e7\u0131klan\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00d6fke Dans\u0131 kitab\u0131nda Dr. Herriet Lerner[4]<\/a> ayr\u0131l\u0131k huzursuzlu\u011funun daha \u00e7ok, ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011fa ve bireyselli\u011fe kar\u015f\u0131 i\u00e7imizde duydu\u011fumuz ve kendimizi ifade etmekten ka\u00e7\u0131nmam\u0131z\u0131n beklendi\u011fi ilk aile deneyimlerimizden gelen ho\u015fnutsuzlu\u011fa dayand\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 iddia eder. Lerner\u2019e g\u00f6re bu t\u00fcr taleplere \u00f6zellikle k\u0131z \u00e7ocuklar\u0131 duyarl\u0131 olur ve \u00f6zerk \u201cben\u201de sahip \u00e7\u0131kmaktansa ili\u015fkideki \u201cbiz\u201di korumada ustala\u015fabilirler.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131zl\u0131k kayg\u0131s\u0131 ile benli\u011fine, kendine sahip \u00e7\u0131kmay\u0131 \u00f6teleyen kad\u0131n\u0131n u\u011frad\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u015fiddet hayat\u0131nda korku, endi\u015fe, \u00fcmitsizlik duygusu, \u00e7aresizlik, utan\u00e7, su\u00e7luluk duygusu gibi k\u0131sa s\u00fcreli etkilerin yan\u0131nda de\u011fersizlik ve yetersizlik duygusu, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fck \u00f6zg\u00fcven, yak\u0131n ili\u015fkilerde zorluk, kendine yabanc\u0131la\u015fma, i\u00e7ine kapanma gibi uzun s\u00fcreli etkiler b\u0131rak\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

G\u00fcndem \u015eiddet Sorun Cezas\u0131zl\u0131k<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Kadir Has \u00dcniversitesi\u2019nin be\u015f y\u0131ld\u0131r ger\u00e7ekle\u015ftirdi\u011fi \u201cToplumsal Cinsiyet ve Kad\u0131n Alg\u0131s\u0131 Ara\u015ft\u0131rmas\u0131\u201d kad\u0131nlar\u0131n en b\u00fcy\u00fck toplumsal sorunu olarak kad\u0131nlar\u0131n y\u00fczde 64\u2019\u00fcn\u00fcn erkeklerin ise y\u00fczde 56\u2019s\u0131n\u0131n \u015fiddeti 1. s\u0131raya koydu\u011funu g\u00f6steriyor. Ayn\u0131 ara\u015ft\u0131rmaya g\u00f6re, kad\u0131nlar\u0131n e\u015fleriyle ili\u015fkisinden duydu\u011fu memnuniyet azal\u0131yor. \u015eiddetin bo\u015fanma i\u00e7in yeterli bir sebep oldu\u011fu, aile b\u00fct\u00fcnl\u00fc\u011f\u00fc ve d\u00fczeni i\u00e7in g\u00f6z ard\u0131 edilecek bir durum olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesine destek oran\u0131 y\u0131ldan y\u0131la art\u0131yor.Koruma talepleri artsa da dava kabul oranlar\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fc\u015f g\u00f6steriyor.[5]<\/a>Yani kad\u0131nlar art\u0131k eskisinden daha fazla \u015fiddet sorununun fark\u0131nda ve kendilerinden uzak tutmak istiyor fakat \u00f6te yandan mahkemelerin koruma karar\u0131n\u0131 vermekten ka\u00e7\u0131nd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcyoruz.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kad\u0131n Cinayetlerini Durduraca\u011f\u0131z Platformu\u2019nun raporuna g\u00f6re 2019\u2019da erkek \u015fiddeti sonucu \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclen 474 kad\u0131n\u0131n 114\u2019\u00fc bo\u015fanmak istemesi, bar\u0131\u015fma iste\u011fini reddetmesi, arkada\u015fl\u0131k iste\u011fini reddetmesi gibi kendi hayat\u0131na dair karar almak istedi\u011fi i\u00e7in \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fc. Koruma karar\u0131 alm\u0131\u015f ve bo\u015fanma davas\u0131 \u00e7\u0131k\u0131\u015f\u0131nda, koruma karar\u0131 istedi\u011fi halde verilmedi\u011fi i\u00e7in, ayr\u0131lma veya bo\u015fanma iste\u011fi bahane g\u00f6sterilerek, evlenme teklifini kabul etmedi\u011fi gerek\u00e7esiyle kad\u0131nlar erkek \u015fiddetiyle \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fc veya yaraland\u0131. Ay\u015fe Pa\u015fal\u0131, Emine Bulut, Ay\u015fe Tuba Arslan bo\u015fand\u0131klar\u0131 erkekler taraf\u0131ndan katledilmeleri ile tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z kad\u0131nlar. Raporda; \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclen kad\u0131nlar\u0131n 134\u2019\u00fcn\u00fcn evli olduklar\u0131 erkek, 25\u2019inin eskiden evli oldu\u011fu erkek, 51\u2019inin birlikte oldu\u011fu erkek, 8\u2019inin eskiden birlikte oldu\u011fu erkek, 29\u2019unun amcas\u0131, eni\u015ftesi, evli oldu\u011fu erke\u011fin babas\u0131, karde\u015finin evli oldu\u011fu erkek gibi akrabal\u0131k ili\u015fkileriyle ba\u011fl\u0131 oldu\u011fu ki\u015filer, y\u00fczde 19\u2019u tan\u0131d\u0131k, 15\u2019i babas\u0131, 13\u2019\u00fc karde\u015fi, 25\u2019i o\u011flu, kom\u015fusu gibi en yak\u0131n\u0131ndaki erkekler taraf\u0131ndan \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fc\u011f\u00fc belirtiliyor.[6]<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Di\u011fer bir \u00f6nemli ger\u00e7ekde, kad\u0131nlar\u0131n %61\u2019inin evlerinde \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f olmas\u0131d\u0131r. Bu veriler bize \u015funu g\u00f6steriyor ki; Covid-19 salg\u0131n\u0131 sebebiyle \u201cevde kal\u201d \u00e7a\u011fr\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131n yap\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 evler kad\u0131nlar i\u00e7in hi\u00e7 de g\u00fcvenli yerler de\u011fil ve yine o evlerdeki erkekler kad\u0131nlar i\u00e7in ba\u015fl\u0131ca tehlike. Bir ba\u015fka ac\u0131 ger\u00e7ek ise; erkek \u015fiddetinin kad\u0131nlar\u0131 kendi hayatlar\u0131na dair karar almalar\u0131, bo\u015fanmalar\u0131 sonras\u0131 da devam etmesi. Tam da bu noktada mevcut yasal d\u00fczenlemelerin uygulanmas\u0131 hususundaki eksiklerden bahsetmemiz gerekiyor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kad\u0131na y\u00f6nelik \u015fiddetle m\u00fccadelenin \u00f6n\u00fcndeki en \u00f6nemli engellerden biri, sistematik bir cezas\u0131zl\u0131k politikas\u0131d\u0131r. Soru\u015fturma ve kovu\u015fturma s\u00fcre\u00e7lerinin makul bir s\u00fcrede bitirilmesi, adaletin gecikmemesi ve ma\u011fdur ve tan\u0131klara yeterli koruma ve g\u00fcvencenin sa\u011flanmas\u0131 cezas\u0131zl\u0131kla m\u00fccadele a\u00e7\u0131s\u0131ndan elzemdir. Bu ba\u011flamda su\u00e7la orant\u0131l\u0131 bir cezan\u0131n belirlenmesi, hapis cezalar\u0131n\u0131n ertelenmemesi yahut adalet duygusunu sarsacak bi\u00e7imde se\u00e7enek yapt\u0131r\u0131mlara \u00e7evrilmemesi, failin salt duru\u015fmalardaki \u201ciyi hal\u201di esas al\u0131narak cezalar\u0131n indirilmemesi, \u00f6zellikle nitelikli cinsel sald\u0131r\u0131 durumunda hapis cezas\u0131 yerine para cezas\u0131na h\u00fckmedilmemesi cezas\u0131zl\u0131k durumunun ortadan kald\u0131r\u0131lmas\u0131 i\u00e7in gereklidir.[7]<\/a> Yani kad\u0131nlar\u0131n \u015fiddeti hayatlar\u0131ndan uzak tutmak istemeleri ve hak arama m\u00fccadelesine kalk\u0131\u015fmalar\u0131 kadar bu aray\u0131\u015fa cevap bulabilmeleri, gereken korumadan faydalanabilmeleri de \u00f6nemlidir ve hatta elzemdir. Zira \u015fiddet g\u00f6rene koruma, uygulayana da yapt\u0131r\u0131m olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 ve hatta tam tersi oldu\u011fu m\u00fcddet\u00e7e \u015fiddet sarmal\u0131 hem evlerde hem de yasama ve yarg\u0131da devam edecektir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ko\u015fulsuz Kad\u0131n Dayan\u0131\u015fmas\u0131<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

\u015eiddet i\u00e7eren toksik ili\u015fkilerden kurtulup ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131zla\u015fman\u0131n yollar\u0131ndan en \u00f6nemlisi kad\u0131n\u0131n g\u00fc\u00e7lenmesidir. Bu da erke\u011fin a\u015fama a\u015fama y\u0131kt\u0131\u011f\u0131 kendine g\u00fcveni yeniden in\u015fa etme ve \u015fiddetin gerek\u00e7esinin olamayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ve bu ili\u015fkiye mecbur olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 anlamas\u0131ndan ge\u00e7er. \u0130li\u015fkileri s\u00fcresince etraf\u0131ndan kopar\u0131l\u0131p, yaln\u0131z b\u0131rak\u0131lan kad\u0131nlar\u0131n yeniden g\u00fc\u00e7lenmelerinin yolu kad\u0131n dayan\u0131\u015fmas\u0131ndan, k\u0131z karde\u015flikten ge\u00e7er. \u015eiddet sarmal\u0131n\u0131n i\u00e7indeki bir kad\u0131n\u0131n buradan \u00e7\u0131kmas\u0131n\u0131 beklerken, bunu desteklerken bunun san\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 kadar kolay olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 akl\u0131m\u0131zdan \u00e7\u0131karmamam\u0131z gerekir. O kad\u0131n\u0131n \u015fiddet \u201cma\u011fduru\u201d, bir \u201ckurban\u201d bizlerinse onu \u00e7ekip \u00e7\u0131karacak \u201ckahramanlar\u201d olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131, \u00f6zg\u00fcrle\u015fmenin ancak ki\u015finin h\u00fcr ve ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131z iradesiyle, haz\u0131r oldu\u011funda ger\u00e7ekle\u015febilece\u011fini unutmamal\u0131y\u0131z.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dowling, (2) \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn ve ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n, ba\u015fkalar\u0131ndan al\u0131namayaca\u011f\u0131, sadece, yo\u011fun emekler sonucu i\u00e7eriden geli\u015ftirilebilece\u011fini ve buna ula\u015fmak i\u00e7in, kendimizi emniyette hissetmek amac\u0131yla kelep\u00e7e gibi kulland\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z her t\u00fcrl\u00fc ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131l\u0131ktan vazge\u00e7mek zorunda oldu\u011fumuzu vurgular.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aslolan kad\u0131nlar\u0131n \u00f6nce kendileri sonra da di\u011fer kad\u0131nlar i\u00e7in aya\u011fa kalkmalar\u0131n\u0131 sa\u011flayacak deste\u011fi her ko\u015fulda sunabilmektir. Biz e\u011fer zehirli ili\u015fkilere son veremeyen, \u015fiddet uygulay\u0131c\u0131s\u0131na kendini mecbur hisseden kad\u0131nlar\u0131 yarg\u0131lamaya ba\u015flar, bunu nas\u0131l bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc bitiremediklerini anlayamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 tekrar eder durur ve bir de aram\u0131za mesafe koyarsak dayan\u0131\u015fmay\u0131 ko\u015fula ba\u011flam\u0131\u015f oluruz.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dilimizden \u201c\u015fiddet ma\u011fduru\u201dnu atm\u0131\u015f ve kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na \u201chayatta kalan\u201d\u0131 koymu\u015f olmam\u0131z bize dayan\u0131\u015fmay\u0131 sadece sona ermi\u015f \u015fiddete u\u011frayanlar \u00fczerinden \u00f6rme \u015fart\u0131 yaratmaz. Yeti\u015fkin bir kad\u0131n\u0131n kendisine \u015fiddet uygulayan bir erke\u011fi affetmesini arzulamayaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131z gibi onu buna iten sebepleri, \u015fiddeti me\u015frula\u015ft\u0131ran eril zihniyeti ve cezas\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131 savunan h\u00fck\u00fcmeti de g\u00f6rmezden gelemeyiz. Unutmayal\u0131m ki, bu \u201caffedi\u015f\u201d ya da yasal \u015fikayetin geri \u00e7ekilmesi su\u00e7un niteli\u011fini de\u011fi\u015ftirmez. Kad\u0131n kurtulu\u015f m\u00fccadelesinin esas\u0131, kad\u0131na y\u00f6nelik \u015fiddet su\u00e7u ve bunu uygulayan, aklayan, yayan eril zihniyete kar\u015f\u0131 m\u00fccadelesinde yatar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dayan\u0131\u015fma t\u00fcm vazge\u00e7i\u015flere, korkulara inat \u015fiddet riski alt\u0131nda olan, \u015fiddete maruz b\u0131rak\u0131lan, bu \u015fiddeti \u015fikayet eden, etmeyen ya da edemeyen, hukuki m\u00fccadelesi devam eden ya da bunu s\u00fcrd\u00fcrmeyen, bask\u0131lar alt\u0131nda ezilen, tecav\u00fcz eden ki\u015fi ile evlendirilen b\u00fct\u00fcn kad\u0131nlar\u0131n sesini y\u00fckseltmeye ve yaln\u0131z olmad\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6stermeye devam etmektir. Dayan\u0131\u015fma, t\u00fcm kad\u0131nlar\u0131n arkas\u0131nda de\u011fil, yanlar\u0131nda ko\u015fulsuz, \u015farts\u0131z \u015fekilde yer al\u0131p onlarla birlikte omuz omuza y\u00fcr\u00fcmeye devam etmektir. Kad\u0131n dayan\u0131\u015fmas\u0131n\u0131 sekteye u\u011fratmak i\u00e7in elinden geleni ard\u0131na koymayan eril zihniyete verilebilecek en kuvveti direni\u015f bu olacakt\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[1]<\/a> Fromm Eric, \u00d6zg\u00fcrl\u00fckten Ka\u00e7\u0131\u015f, 1996<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[2]<\/a> Dowling Collette, Sindirella Kompleksi, 1992<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[3]<\/a> https:\/\/dergipark.org.tr\/en\/download\/article-file\/437960<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

[4]<\/a> Lerner Dr. Herriet, \u00d6fke Dans\u0131, 1985.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

https:\/\/www.milliyet.com.tr\/pembenar\/aile-terapisti-volkan-pelenk\/psikolojik-iskence-gaslighting-2907073<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

[5]<\/a> https:\/\/www.evrensel.net\/haber\/391841\/turkiyede-kadinlarin-en-buyuk-sorunu-siddet-issizlik-ve-kadin-erkek-esitsizligi<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

[6]<\/a> http:\/\/kadincinayetlerinidurduracagiz.net\/veriler\/2889\/kadin-cinayetlerini-durduracagiz-platformu-2019-raporu<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

[7]<\/a> http:\/\/www.ankarabarosu.org.tr\/siteler\/ankarabarosu\/tekmakale\/2015-4\/11.pdf<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bu yaz\u0131 ilk olarak \u015furada yay\u0131nlanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r: https:\/\/elyazmalari.com\/2020\/04\/22\/gundem-siddet-sorun-cezasizlik-cozum-kosulsuz-kadin-dayanismasi-cigdem-altunok\/<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u015eiddet i\u00e7eren toksik ili\u015fkilerden kurtulup ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131zla\u015fman\u0131n yollar\u0131ndan en \u00f6nemlisi kad\u0131n\u0131n g\u00fc\u00e7lenmesidir. Bu da erke\u011fin a\u015fama a\u015fama y\u0131kt\u0131\u011f\u0131 kendine g\u00fcveni yeniden in\u015fa\u00a0etme\u00a0ve \u015fiddetin gerek\u00e7esinin olamayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ve bu ili\u015fkiye mecbur olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 anlamas\u0131ndan ge\u00e7er. \u0130li\u015fkileri s\u00fcresince etraf\u0131ndan kopar\u0131l\u0131p,\u00a0yaln\u0131z b\u0131rak\u0131lan kad\u0131nlar\u0131n yeniden g\u00fc\u00e7lenmelerinin yolu kad\u0131n dayan\u0131\u015fmas\u0131ndan, k\u0131z karde\u015flikten ge\u00e7er. Eric Fromm, \u201c\u00d6zg\u00fcrl\u00fckten Ka\u00e7\u0131\u015f\u201d[1] kitab\u0131na insan\u0131n neden kendi \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc diktat\u00f6rlerin eline…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":2419,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_eb_attr":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[94],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[580],"class_list":["post-2418","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-derleme","author-cigdem-altinok"],"authors":[{"term_id":580,"user_id":9,"is_guest":0,"slug":null,"display_name":"\u00c7i\u011fdem Altunok","avatar_url":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/wp-content\/litespeed\/avatar\/89c8a8ab4222d067d3d7e05036b9a7d1.jpg?ver=1787896370","author_category":"","first_name":"\u00c7i\u011fdem","last_name":"Altunok","user_url":"","job_title":"","description":"cigdemaltunok@mordayanisma.org"}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2418","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/9"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2418"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2418\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2419"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2418"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2418"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2418"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mordayanisma.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/ppma_author?post=2418"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}